Behaviour that Ruins a Marriage

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There exist certain basic and fundamental expectations, obligations and considerations in a marital relationship, which ought to be respected and cared for. Any cheating or negligence on the part of a spouse may vitiate this delicate bond and may push it

There exist certain basic and fundamental expectations, obligations and considerations in a marital relationship, which ought to be respected and cared for. Any cheating or negligence on the part of a spouse may vitiate this delicate bond and may push it towards divorce. Nobody wants his or her marriage to end up in a divorce, yet people often resort to or succumb to certain behaviour patterns that inevitably prove to be disastrous in the long run.

In the current scenario, people mostly tend to get married in their late twenties or early thirties. Marrying at a mature age may often prove to be advantageous, as it allows both the spouses to use their wisdom and acumen while dealing with the day-to-day issues and problems. However, this may also prove to be a disadvantage if either or both the spouses persist in carrying on with their bachelor state of mind even after marriage.

Sometimes, people fail to give up their so-called rationally selfish mentality that is the hallmark of bachelorhood. While tying the nuptial bonds, they forget to realize that from now onwards, they will have to live in a team scenario. It becomes important that they start looking for words like compromise, adjustment, cooperation and cohesion in their dictionaries.

Be it the marriage, business or any other social arrangement, people who ultimately prove to be successful are those that are willing to adapt to the changes ushered in by the existing circumstances. Marriage is a relationship that calls for many adjustments on the part of both the spouses. It requires people to get rid of some of their past habits and behaviour patterns that may cause friction in the domestic terrain. Yet, people sometimes continue to persist with their bad, irritating and annoying habits. Such stubbornness can ruin a marriage and may lead to a divorce.

Change often proves to be difficult for most of the people. It may sometimes lead to frustration and anger. However, it is possible to shed off one?s lousy habits after marriage, if one is willing to cooperate and communicate with his or her spouse rather than seeing him or her as an irritating adversary. Empathizing with one?s spouse may help one understand his or her legitimate expectations and concerns. This new-found awareness combined with love can surely motivate an individual to give up his or her adamancy so as to streamline the marital machinery.

A sincere spouse often looks for companionship in a marital relationship. It is vital that both the partners get a genuine sense of participation while making important decisions concerning their family and well-being. This calls for cohesion, cooperation and understanding on the part of both the spouses. However, sometimes spouses choose to behave independently while taking important decisions, without informing or involving their partner or considering how his or her life will be affected. This may expose the neglected spouse to a terrible sense of isolation and can ruin a marriage.

Thus, it is very important that both the spouses work as a team and come out with their opinions and suggestions while making all the important decisions. This generates a positive energy in the family and stimulates both the spouses to take an active interest in their marital life.

Trust is the basic foundation on which rests the institution of marriage. Dishonesty, lying and hiding things from the partner may erode that sense of faith that is the very basis of any healthy relationship. Secrecy and negative manipulation often create a debilitating situation that spoils the family atmosphere. Once a spouse decisively comes to the conclusion that his or her life partner is not honest and straightforward, it corrodes the feeling of affection and respect that he or she has for him or her. Once a trust is lost, things start deteriorating and may culminate in a divorce.

Hence, it is very important for two partners in a marital relationship to be honest and above board with each other. Being honest and trustworthy may sometimes prove to be difficult. However, this does not mean that one should act dishonestly and guilefully in a marriage. Often spouses are able to realize the strength and weaknesses of each other. In the long run, being truthful always strengthens and stimulates a marital relationship.

Published on:
By: Jess Lorinter
AUTHOR:
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you would like more information on how to get a quickie Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com

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